A bridesmaid is a girl or young woman who attends to the bride during or after a wedding or marriage ceremony. Traditionally, bridesmaids were chosen from unwed young women of marriageable age.

In early Roman times, bridesmaids formed a kind of bridal infantry as they accompanied the bride to the groom's village. This "protective shield" of similarly dressed bridesmaids was supposed to intervene if any wayward thugs or vengeful suitors tried to hurt the bride or steal her dowry.

However, the Western bridesmaid tradition seems to have originated from later Roman law, which required ten witnesses at a wedding in order to outsmart evil spirits believed to attend marriage ceremonies. The bridesmaids and ushers dressed in identical clothing to the bride and groom, so that the evil spirits would not know who was getting married. Even as late as 19th century England, there was a belief that ill-wishers could administer curses and taint the wedding. In Victorian wedding photographs, for example, the bride and groom can look very similar to other members of the bridal party.

The principal bridesmaid is called the maid of honor (or matron of honor if she is married).

A bridesmaid is often a close friend or sister. Often there is more than one bridesmaid: in modern times the bride chooses how many to have. Historically, no person of status went out unattended, and the size of the retinue was closely calculated to be appropriate to the status of the personage.

 

"Bridesmaid" as an idiomatic term

The term "bridesmaid" itself has also come to refer to one who comes close to attaining what is desired, only to fall just short, alluding to the fact that though a bridesmaid plays a large role in a wedding, she is not the one for whom the ceremony is given nor is she the center of attention. Commonly recited expressions about this member of the wedding party are "always a bridesmaid, but never a bride" and "thrice a bridesmaid, never a bride"-- an old charm that can be broken by being a bridesmaid seven times.

The term is used especially commonly to refer to a sports team or athlete that routinely comes close to winning an award or championship, only to come up just short. Jason Kidd of the New Jersey Nets had stated, for instance, that he was tired of being the "bridesmaid" after two consecutive losses in the NBA finals (to the Los Angeles Lakers in 2002 and to the San Antonio Spurs in 2003). Other notable bridesmaid teams during the 1990's were the Buffalo Bills, Utah Jazz, the England Cricket Team (for reaching the finals of the Cricket World Cup thrice and not winning it even once) and the New York Knicks.

This idiomatic usage of the word bridesmaid most probably began in 1917 when Fred W Leigh and Charles Collins compose "Always a Bridesmaid":

‘Why am I always a bridesmaid,
Never the blushing bride?
Ding! Dong! Wedding bells
Always ring for other gals.
But one fine day –
Please let it be soon –
I shall wake up in the morning
On my own honeymoon.’

The Maid of Honor is, after the bride, the primary female member of the wedding party in a wedding. Specifically, she is the primary attendant with the most honors and duties of the bridal party, and is considered the equilvant of the groom's best man.

 

United States

In the United States, the bride might have several bridesmaids, but the Maid of Honor is the title and position held by the bride's chief attendant, typically her closest friend or sister. If married, the title Matron of Honor is used.

Her duties may be as many or as varied as the bride may wish to impose upon her, but typically, she is responsible for:

 

Pre wedding

• Traveling with the bride to help choose a wedding venue.
• Helping to choose and address wedding invitations.
• Going with the bride to help with the shopping for her wedding dress as well as the bridesmaid dresses.
• Going with the bride to register for her wedding gifts.
• Helping the bride with the seating arrangements.
• Hosting and planning the bridal shower as well as the bachelorette party.
• Maintaining communication and organization with the other bridesmaids.
• Attending and assisting during the rehearsal dinner.

 

Wedding day

• Assisting the bride with her dress and makeup.
• Being the messenger if the bride wants to communicate sight-unseen with the family or groom.
• Visiting the reception room to check on the details.
• Helping to make sure the bride has privacy before the ceremony if desired.
• Signing of the marriage license after the ceremony.
• Helping the bride with her veil and train before, during and after the ceremony.
• Holding the bride’s bouquet during the ceremony as required.
• Holding the groom's wedding ring to hand to the bride during the ceremony
• Making a toast and/or speech during the reception.
• Securing any money as might be given to the wedding couple during the reception.
• Providing emotional support as needed.

 

United Kingdom

In the United Kingdom, the term "maid of honour" originally referred to the female attendant of a queen. The term "bridesmaid" is normally used for a bridal attendant. However, when the attendant is married, or is a mature woman, the term "matron of honour" is more commonly used. The influence of American English has led to the Chief Bridesmaid sometimes being called the Maid of Honour.

In the UK, a "maid of honour" is also a type of small cake.